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Sheriff's Calls

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An Offbeat Look at Area Crime

Landlord-tenant relations get complicated

BEAR CREEK CANYON — The breathless tenant called JCSO in a tizzy. On the evening of May 24, he excitedly explained, his landlord had entered his home unbidden and yelled mean things at him from the bottom of the stairs. Tenant said he’d felt threatened and wanted deputies to slap a leash on Landlord. Contacted elsewhere, Landlord freely admitted entering Tenant’s rental unit and yelling at Tenant to stop dumping boxes of store-ables in Landlord’s garage. Officers asked Landlord why he thought he could just barge into Tenant’s home any time he felt like it. Landlord explained that he’s been dating Tenant’s mom, and his and her comings and goings between the two residences are typically intimate and informal. Landlord expressed the opinion that his relationship with Tenant’s mom is Tenant’s real beef, not his occasional unannounced visits. Asked for illumination, Tenant’s mom testified that she did have a verbal agreement with Landlord whereby he retains domain over the whole garage in exchange for providing free firewood, and that he does have her permission to enter Tenant’s house at will. That was news to Tenant, who said that, as the primary rent payer, his permission was the only one that mattered and he wasn’t giving it. Deputies secured assurances that Landlord and Tenant would stick to their respective turfs until Tenant’s lease is up next month.

 

Hand-bagged

SWEDE GULCH ROAD — On the afternoon of May 22, a Very Large Store informed JCSO that Light-Fingered Lily had stuffed her handbag full of miscellaneous items and bolted without paying. Deputies caught up with Lily less than a mile away and asked her for some ID. Lily said she misplaced her driver’s license, but assured them that Lily was her name and obeying the law was her game. She further showed officers a handbag containing only non-stolen personal items. Deputies told Lily they suspected that Lily wasn’t her real name, and that a second handbag in the back seat probably contained items stolen from the Very Large Store. They further told Lily that she could either come clean on the spot or take a trip down to Golden, where they could sort things out less comfortably. Lily caved, revealing that she’s really Light-Fingered Lulu, and that the handbag in the backseat was, indeed, stuffed with items that weren’t, strictly speaking, hers. Deputies sited Lorelei for theft, then arrested her on three outstanding failure-to-appear warrants out of Clear Creek County.

 

Two or three too many

INDIAN HILLS — Justin and Jessica started drinking on the afternoon of May 23, and kept drinking until they started getting on each other’s nerves. By 5:30 p.m. they were both so pickled and prickly that they started to get on their neighbors’ nerves. At 6 o’clock the neighbors asked JCSO to pull the plug. Justin unsteadily admitted deputies into the house, sloppily explained that he and Jessica had downed perhaps “three or four whiskey drinks” each, and mumbled that the blood on his hands was Jessica’s. Alarmed, officers asked to see Jessica, who was in the bathroom tending a cut on her wrist. Justin said Jessica got cut when she punched the window out of the front door. Jessica said Justin actually broke the window by slamming the door into her outstretched fist. Both could agree that neither had hit the other, and that they’d been fighting because Justin “is a (bad boyfriend).” Officers determined that Jessica’s injury was a predictable and non-criminal consequence of intoxication and ill humor. They advised the couple to lay off the whiskey drinks and give the neighbors a break. Justin and Jessica promised to be good.